Columns

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The Humanoids: For The Win

There are lots of losers every week. I’m sure most people would include yours truly in that category. I’d imagine that I would classify myself in that category after tonight’s $50 million Lotto Max draw. (Though I’d consider myself a winner if I won a free ticket.) That being said, there are a lot of folks that had good weeks this week. Now watch in amazement as I try to drag them back down into the dregs of loserdom with me. Some people can pull rabbits out of their ass, I can turn gold to lead. Everyone has their own skill set.

Meanwhile, we’re back to being busy on the radio front. The next show is shaping up to be a solid one. Not an instant classic but an above average half-hour of talk for campus radio. Naturally, the Extra will be even better. All sorts of TV talk, love gone wrong and Christopher Walken’s poker face. That goes down on November 10th at 6:30PM. While you’re here or catching up on the radio show, drop by our new buddies at Lion’s Den University. They’re up and coming stars in the blogosphere and a regular stop when I make my morning rounds of the interweb. Continue reading →

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The Humanoids: You’re Still Here?

No, I’m not asking why you’re still coming back for more Humanoids randominity. I’m asking why some of this week’s targets are in the news. Some folks just keep kicking around, almost taunting us that they’re in the news and we’re not. That they’re famous and we’re not. They could just ride off quietly into the sunset but they instead keep grabbing at that addicting spotlight. But I suppose that we all want to be in that spotlight at some point in our lives. If being famous, being the centre of attention, is one of our life goals, I guess that I can understand why people are so hesitant to willingly give it.

Good news: I un-fucked up the radio show. Long story short, nobody listened to the final radio cut before it aired and it got a little disjointed in the middle. It jumped from dingo crocodiles to crazy campus cops. It’s all better now. I dropped some of sports for the added UWO police brutality talk. This version is up for download and is one of my favourite ever. Continue reading →

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The Humanoids: Ending a Long Week

It’s been a long week. For some, it’s been a pretty good week. For others, they’re happy that its the weekend. Unless you’re the Toronto Maple Leafs or a fan of them. Either way, come Saturday night, you’re going to have to drink off some of the night’s memories.

Sorry for the lack of a long spiel up top. I’ve been swamped with real work and radio/blog work. The good news is that the next episode of the radio show is next week. It’s on Tuesday at 6:30PM EDT on radio in London, ON or online here. The next episode is all about The Beatles and zombies (and the usual assorted stuff). It’s easily my favourite episode of the new season and is easily on my Top 10 list of favourite episodes. Continue reading →

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The Humanoids: Thanksgiving Hangover

The Humanoids is back from another week off. Not that anyone missed it, I’m sure. Anyway, there’s no real rhyme or reason to this week’s column. Maybe it’s getting back to what I originally envisioned the column as: A weekly look at some compelling persons, places, and things. And I won’t be talking about that balloon kid. After all, he’s dominated CNN since it happened and likely will for the next couple of months. I’d rather talk about anything else. Has anyone else noticed that long weekends are good at the time but mess up the rest of the week? I’ve found myself completely lost this week because I’m working four instead of five days. I thought yesterday was Friday even though I knew it wasn’t because I still had to finish writing this column. Oh, the fun that the tryptophan in the turkey has with you.

By the way, did you catch last week’s episode of The Lowdown radio show? I don’t blame you if you didn’t. It wasn’t one of our best efforts ever. From the news onward, it was pretty good though. The next episode is lining up to be pretty good. We’re taping it tonight. We’ll have a The Beatles: Rock Band review and some Halloween related stuff too. If all goes well, it should be an instant classic. Continue reading →

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The Humanoids: Fade To Black

It’s a slightly abbreviated version of The Humanoids today. I blame it largely on catching swine flu or something like that. Yeah, getting swine flu and blogging sounds reasonably tough for the internet. Let’s go with that. So as my time on earth apparently fades to black, so do many of our subjects today. Some have seen their careers come to an apparent end. Others are still going for the time being but you would have to imagine they’re in bad shape or are going to close up shop soon.

Speaking of things closing up shop soon, the radio show will be taping tonight. Why would the radio show be closing up shop soon? Well, there might be a change in plans/location for a host which could throw a wrench in the usual operations. We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it. We always manage to solve things at the last second. Anyway, on with the show. Continue reading →

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The Humanoids: It Was A Mistake

Everyone makes a mistake now and then. It’s learning from those mistakes that allows us to learn. Of course, some folks won’t give you a chance to actually learn from your mistakes. Instead, you’ll get thrown under a bus and no one will let you have a chance to make up for yourself. Bill Buckner might have been a good player but all he’s remembered for is that one mistake in the World Series. Some of our subjects have made mistakes that can’t or won’t be fixed. One person hasn’t made a mistake but rather it was me making it (i.e. Mark Martin).

Speaking of a mistake, it’s a mistake if you don’t catch some of next week’s episode of The Lowdown. It’s our big fantasy hockey and 2009-10 NHL season preview. The Lowdown Extra is going to be over an hour long with mostly hockey talk. That’s more than double the length of a regular radio show. That next episode will air on September 29th at 6:30 PM. Continue reading →

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The Humanoids: Gonna Fly Now

This week on The Humanoids, I’m talking about people riding a recently found wave of popularity and notoriety. These folks you just wouldn’t have brought up in conversation last week. They’ve gone from being completely off the radar to being the lead topics around the water cooler this week. Some of these conversations have just been folks rolling their eyes when they hear a name. Other conversations get people riled up over some of the dumb things that they’re tied up in. Will we still be talking about them next week? I don’t know because I sure didn’t think that they would be in this week’s column when I finished up last week’s. That’s why this column is subtitled Gonna Fly Now.

By the by, The Lowdown made its triumphant return to radio this week. We returned for Season Three on 94.9FM CHRW. You can find all the action here. We’re back on September 29 at 6:30 PM with our NHL preview special. It’s going to be a half-hour of fantasy hockey and general hockey season previews. Because the show is based in London, we have to throw in some gratuitous local content which means team previews of Detroit and Toronto. Expect the number 1967 to come up quite a bit. Continue reading →

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The Humanoids: Loose Ends

The theme behind this week’s Humanoids is tying up loose ends. Or at least that’s generally the idea.  Everyone has loose ends that need tying up at some time or other. Most of my subjects of ridicule had some loose end that is being tied up or just coming to light. I know that I have some loose ends that need tying up. Actually, I can’t find enough time to tie up all of my loose ends. Despite their public loose ends being tied up, that’s probably just the tip of the iceberg for my victims.

Just a reminder that The Lowdown radio show returns next Tuesday at 6:30 PM on 94.9 FM in London, ON, and on CHRWradio.com. It’s going to be a fun half-hour of laughs and excitement that you don’t want to miss. We’ll have the downloadable versions of the show online around 7:00 PM including the first ever Lowdown Extra broadcast. Continue reading →

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The Humanoids: Back to School

It’s that time of year again. The kids are back off for another 10 months of having their heads crammed with stuff that they’ll quickly forget over the intervening two months before the next school year. That is unless you’re at college or university. Then you’re learning stuff that is generally useful to you. Actually, at least around my neck of the woods, the kids aren’t in school today. Teachers are already burning a day off today because school had to start early because Labour Day was later this year. Universities and colleges don’t need to start the year earlier to get in all the teaching they need. I’m sure elementary school and high school teachers would protest my insinuation that they are wasting their and the kids’ time by starting school early. They’re wrong, though. The whole first week of school is a waste anyway. Why not start the Tuesday after Labour Day and actually get down to business right away? And don’t get me started about the waste that is the month of June. Anyway, the subjects of today’s series of skewerings need to go back to school or have to their associates back to school. It’s an amazingly eclectic lineup that I’ve got today. Something for the whole family here.

This week’s radio show news is good news. Jackie and I are taping the season premiere on Saturday. Our new boss at CHRW wanted to hear the show early. The news will be a little dated but we’ll manage somehow. We’re still waiting to hear back from Activision and Harmonix about getting games to review but no dice so far. I was hoping to make GH5 and The Beatles: Rock Band the centrepieces of a music special but those dreams are disappearing quickly. By the way, have you checked out the new car wall index we put up on the blog? Continue reading →

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The Humanoids: Slow Week

I can’t remember the last time I wrote a Humanoids column right up to the final few minutes before noon. I’m used to editing up until that point but not actually writing at the last minute. That’s what happens when you have a decidedly slow week. I couldn’t tell you if anything interesting happened this week besides Shaq running around in a pink speedo on network TV. Not that I would call that interesting as much as disturbing. Anyway, it’s probably a good thing that not much is happening this week. We’re coming up on the last week of summer and people should be on holiday so there shouldn’t be much news. This time of year and Christmas are two times of year that I won’t mind having to scramble for stories because nobody wants anything to happen then. Except for the media. They’ll make a mountain out of a mole hill if it gets them ratings. Actually, we could call that the theme for this week. It seems most of my subjects in this week’s column have been victimized by mountaineering.

Looking for the latest radio update from Lowdown HQ? Well, I’ve taped most of my review of NCAA Football 10 for the season premiere on September 15th. I’m also planning on using the game for something very Western related. Maybe they’ll run it on the Saturday after the show too. Jackie and I are also going to do a tour of London for the frosh during the season premiere. The last time we did a tour for the frosh, I got killed when parts of the then under construction Campus Rec Centre fell on me. I hope it goes better this time. And remember kids: I may have been killed but I got better, you might not. Continue reading →