After a lengthy hiatus, it’s the return of all the news that’s not fit for print. It’s time for the Not News of the Week.

Move over Plaxico Burress. A man in Washingon has just had a worse incident of shooting yourself because your handgun slid out from under the waistband of your belt. The man was in a Lowe’s Home Improvement store in Lynwood, Washington, when his gun accidentally discharged. Unlike the incarcerated NFL star who shot himself in the leg, things were much worse for this man. His gun shot him in the testicles. Police haven’t released any details on how the man’s boys are doing but even a close call would be ridiculously traumatizing. Continue reading →