Another week in the long, cold NHL season has come and gone. Not coming or going is the #1 team in the rankings. The Penguins’ winning streak ended at 12 games in a loss to the Philadelphia Flyers but they’re still the best team in the league right now. Mind you, none of the top three teams changed spots but I’m not convinced that the cream has risen to the top already.

#1 Pittsburgh Penguins (Last Week #1)
Yup, they’re still at the top of the Power Rankings. When you win 12 straight games and your best player is on the hot streak of his life, you’re likely to top everyone’s power rankings. And yes, I said Sid the Kid is on a hot streak. He’s playing out of his mind right now. That doesn’t make him Gretzky as much as the hockey media wants you to believe that Crosby is as good as or better than Gretzky. I’ve seen both play. The Great One will always be the better player in my mind because he was smarter than everyone else on the ice. If he didn’t prove that small guys could make it in the NHL, we wouldn’t be talking about Crosby right now.

#2 Detroit Red Wings (LW #2)
Despite getting pounded by the Kings, I think we’re looking at another repeat of the 2008 and 2009 Stanley Cup finals. Detroit looks to be the class of the Western Conference and, based on current form, should roll though all opposition in the playoffs. Pittsburgh and Philly is a pick ’em right now. It’ll come down to Richards vs. Crosby to determine the winner of that one. Everyone talks about Crosby’s rivalry with Washington but I think that Crosby vs. the Wings is the bigger rivalry in the NHL right now. It’s just not as marketable.

#3 Dallas Stars (LW #3)
I’m starting to wonder if the Stars are punching a bit above their weight class right now. They’re on a hot streak that’s powered them to the top of the Pacific Division and 2nd in the Western Conference. However, they’re only +4 on the goal differential. I know you’re probably sick of me using that as a barometer but that says to me that they’re only just outplaying their opponents. You need to outscore your opponents to win the game but it looks like they aren’t doing it convincingly enough to stay on top forever.

#4 Philadelphia Flyers (LW #7)
Sorry, Flyers, but you’re irrelevant in Philadelphia this week. Even in the off-season, the Phillies are dominating the Philadelphia sports scene. For the second straight off-season, the Phils have made an epic splash and improved their starting rotation even farther ahead the field than it already was. Cliff Lee spurned the Yankees, Nationals and others to go back to Philadelphia for about $50 million less than New York offered. So now we have to endure some years of bad nicknames for the Phillies starting rotation as Lee, Halladay, Hamels and Oswalt are now apparently known as the “Phab Four.”

#5 New York Rangers (LW #9)
The gang at Jeopardy have gotten really desperate for attention. They’re going to pit two past champions against an IBM super computer which has been designed to mimic human intelligence. The computer will do battle with Ken Jennings, owner of Jeopardy’s longest winning streak, and Brad Rutter, Jeopardy’s highest total money winner. I don’t see how this will be a fair fight. First, the computer doesn’t have thumbs to buzz in. Second, the Jennings stall tactic will probably throw the computer off enough that it wouldn’t be able to buzz in if they gave it thumbs. Maybe, just maybe, Jennings will add to his record win total.

#6 Atlanta Thrashers (LW #8)
Somehow, someway, the Thrashers keep winning. It reminds me of the year that they won the division except that Washington hadn’t quite figured things out. It’s amazing that in the span of five seasons, the Thrashers went from division champs to 3rd last in the NHL to 4th last to trading away their franchise player to 8th in the East but 7 points up on 9th and one of the hottest teams in the NHL. Not too bad for a team whose literal goalie collapse looked likely to be a metaphor for the season.

#7 Boston Bruins (LW #10)
The Tim Thomas Revival tour has gotten the B’s to (for all intents and purposes given that they have two games in hand over the Habs) tops of the Northeast Division. They’re 3rd in the league in goal differential almost entirely due to Thomas’ stellar play between the pipes. They’re mid-pack in goals for but have the fewest goals against. They’re only five off tops in goal differential despite the fact that the leading Flyers have a 27 goal edge in goals for. I know that the pundits worry about a lack of Boston offence but clearly stopping the puck is working for them.

#8 Vancouver Canucks (LW #11)
On Saturday, the Canucks retired the number of Captain Canucklehead Markus Naslund. It was a very nice ceremony and all that but I didn’t understand half of it. Why was the announcer guy, the one everyone called “Shorty,” miked up the whole time so we could hear him asking one of the Sedins why he wore his gloves at the podium? Why did Naslund get tickets to the 2011 French Open, 2012 Olympic opening ceremonies and 2012 Olympic tennis? It all seems a bit much and a bit odd if you ask me.

#9 Washington Capitals (LW #6)
Ovechkin got in a fight! Is that a first? Actually, his last fight was over four years ago when he dropped the gloves with Buffalo’s Paul Gaustad. Okay, he didn’t really drop the glove so much as cheap shotted Danny Briere and paid the price. Same thing happened against the Rangers. Low hip-check on Girardi and Dubinsky extracts quick revenge with his fists. I like Ovi but he deserved a walloping both times. He’s got to start thinking about how his actions affect the team before throwing around cheap shots. Not making the hit won’t make a big difference for his team but sitting 5 minutes in the box will.

#10 Montreal Canadiens (LW #5)
You lose to the Leafs, you drop in the Power Rankings. Hell, for half the game, it looked like they never left Detroit. And that Detroit thing was a waste of money for Habs fans. The Wings thoroughly outplayed the Habs in this one. Sure, it was close in the end but I don’t think that Montreal would have threatened for a win if they didn’t get a few bounces going their way. There’s still some work to be done for last season’s almost conference champs.

#11 Tampa Bay Lightning (LW #4)
Evgeni Nabokov was released from his Russian oil money league team. Sorry, I meant to say he was released from the KHL. Anyway, there are two teams that are rumoured to be vying for his services. One is his former home, the San Jose Sharks. But they don’t have much cap space to spare so they may want to save cash for the trade deadline. The other is the Lightning who don’t have much goaltending but have scads of space under the cap. Looks like Dan Ellis’ next money problem is from Russia with love.

#12 Phoenix Coyotes (LW #12)
It looks like we’re days or weeks away from the Coyotes having a new owner. Matt Hulszier’s been approved as the new owner by the Board of Governors. The City of Glendale is willing to give Hulszier $197 million to buy the team from the NHL for $170 million. In other words, if Hulszier holds onto the team for the next six years (per the agreement with Glendale), he’ll make a $27 million profit on the transaction (plus or minus any profit or loss by the team). That’s more than any other owner of that franchise has made in the desert. Gotta make Gary happy.

#13 Chicago Blackhawks (LW #13)
Guess who’s going to be on The Price Is Right? Former NHL and Blackhawks great Jeremy Roenick. He’ll be on with Alex Ovechkin and that Crosby dude to promote the Winter Classic. Slightly ironic that a staple of CBS’ lineup for nearly 40 years is going to be promoting NBC’s biggest NHL game. Anyway, the three will be on their unveiling prize packages for the Classic during the Showcases. The Winter Classic package will have tickets to the game, ice-level passes to practices, VIP passes to the NHL New Year’s Eve party and… A NEW CAR! The other Showcase will include a “once-in-a-lifetime” trip to the 2011 Stanley Cup Final. So set your TiVo for December 20th.

#14 San Jose Sharks (LW #16)
As I’m going through the process of writing, I’ve covered LA so I’ll have to stick the Hollywood gossip here. Ryan Reynolds and Scarlett Johansson are getting divorced. And every guy reading this just cheered. I can understand why. We all think we have a chance even if we all know that we don’t have a hope in hell. My point is that I don’t understand why any celebrity would get married. Even with a pre-nup, it would cost a lot more to get married and divorced than to stay together unwed for the five years or less you’re together. Let’s face it, Hollywood marriages are a sham. They’re glorified publicity stunts. Why people care, I’ll never know.

#15 Anaheim Ducks (LW #18)
I just realized that the new Ducks alternate logo has the old duck-shaped goalie mask in it ala the old Mighty Ducks days. That’ll make Jackie happy. He always liked the old teal coloured trim that the original Mighty Ducks uniforms used. My only real problem with that new alternate logo is the gratuitous use of the beige-ish colour that’s used in all the other Ducks logos. What’s wrong with the orange? It’s no teal but it’s a damn sight better than beige.

#16 Colorado Avalanche (LW #15)
The big news in Denver is the dance that Matt Duchesne and Paul Statsny do after each win. Since I don’t watch How I Met Your Mother, I didn’t get it. However, it’s supposed to be the “bang-bang-bangity-bang-bang” dance (or something like that). I’m not bashing the dance, though I hear the show has been off a bit this year. I think it’s good that the kids are having some good clean fun. Unlike that DeSean Jackson douchejuice who plays for the Philly Eagles. Total douchejuice celebration. (Yes, I just used that Buzz Bissinger-ism.)

#17 Nashville Predators (LW #17)
A shocking survey out of the United States shows that more American teens are smoking pot than last year. It’s an absolute catastrophe and an utter failing of American society. On the plus side, they’re drinking less. In all seriousness, I don’t see how this is news… Well, except to say that Miley Cyrus is a normal teenager for smoking pot. It’s just that if my cousin smoked up, it wouldn’t be on TMZ and wouldn’t even make Facebook. It’s normal adolescent behaviour. That’s the biggest problem with American society. They want to be world leaders but their society is routinely stuck in an 1800s mindset.

#18 Los Angeles Kings (LW #19)
Fuck you, Jonathan Quick. The bastard stopped 51 shots that my Wings fired against him for a 5-0 shutout win for the Kings. I know that LA dropped scads of goals but an average goalie would have let in 5 goals on 50 shots. But the Wings have this uncanny ability to run into hot goalies. Over the last few years, I can think of names like Giguere, Roloson, Fleury and now Quick. What is with Detroit not having any luck with goalies?

#19 St. Louis Blues (LW #21)
I just discovered something. Jaroslav Halak was drafted in the 9th round (271st overall) of the 2003 NHL Entry Draft by the Montreal Canadiens. For all the great things that we hear about the Red Wings scouting department for discovering star players in the late rounds of the draft, we sure haven’t heard a word about the great work by the Habs scouting crew. Even as a Wings fan, that’s a bit of hypocrisy by the media. Or maybe they finally realized that late-round picks are basically a craps shoot.

#20 Columbus Blue Jackets (LW #14)
Remember Nikita Filatov. He was the CBJ that bailed on the team early last season to go play in Russia because he didn’t like the coach or something like that. He stayed in the NHL voluntarily this season. However, it’s the involuntary part that got him. He was just sent down to the AHL after notching only 7 assists in 23 games. He’s quickly becoming a bust of Alex Daigle-ian proportions. He was a 6th overall pick who dominated the World Juniors, AHL (in 2008-09) and Russia but can’t hack it in the NHL. He shouldn’t worry, though. The KHL’s willing to pickup just about any NHL washout.

#21 Buffalo Sabres (LW #20)
Mark February 21st down on your calendar. That’s when Richard Branson will play airline stewardess on an Air Asia flight from London to Kuala Lumpur. If you recall some of my F1 coverage, Branson made a bet that his F1 team would fare better than Air Asia head Tony Fernandes’ team with the loser serving on the winners airline as a stewardess for a flight. Seats are being auctioned off for charity so you can be served booze by Sir Richard Branson. That would pretty cool. That and it’s supposed to be a party flight. That’s even more cool.

#22 Carolina Hurricanes (LW #22)
The Sports Business Journal ran a brief article for non-subscribers (it was longer for paid subscribers) about the financial situation of the Carolina Hurricanes. The Cardiac Canes nickname may now apply to the ownership’s bankers. Revenues were down 25% from the 2008-09 fiscal year in 2009-10. The Canes fiscal years end on June 30. Part of that drop was due to not making the playoffs. From what I can glean from the article’s picture caption, the team also didn’t qualify for revenue sharing. Is it time to move the team back to Hartford?

#23 Minnesota Wild (LW #23)
Well, Brett Favre’s season started with a big bang thanks to his little dongslinger. Now, it looks like it’s all over. The roof of the Metrodome collapsing just delayed the inevitable. That was Brett Favre’s age finally catching up with him playing like a kid out there. Alas, the only downside of this was that only folks in Minneapolis-St. Paul and New York saw the historic moment of Favre’s streak ending. I think the whole of the NFL fandom would have wanted to share in that moment. And then quickly flip away so we wouldn’t have to listen to Joe Buck cry for three straight hours. Actually, now that I think about it, I’d like to listen to that.

#24 Edmonton Oilers (LW #25)
Linus Omark… That is all. Hey, I don’t fault the guy for doing the spin-o-rama stuttering slap shot in the shootout. Before that, the Oilers were 0-4 in the shootout making them the worst team at that in the NHL. They still have the worst winning percentage of any team that’s been in four or more shootouts this season (there are a couple of 0-2 and 0-3 teams but I’m claiming small sample size on those). The good news for Edmonton is that if a miracle happens and they get close to a playoff spot, they won’t have shootout wins hurting their tiebreaker chances.

#25 Florida Panthers (LW #24)
I know the Panthers are quickly plummeting down the standings but I haven’t lost the faith. After all, these guys have Tomas Vokoun in goal. He’s not an All-Star or even a superstar but I don’t think any sane people would rank him among the bottom half of starters. Granted, with the likes of Vokoun, McCabe and Cory Stillman in the final year of their respective contracts, you’d have to figure that at least a couple of them are on their way out. For now, they’re not a bottom five team but come deadline day…

#26 Toronto Maple Leafs (LW #28)
The big news from Saturday’s game wasn’t that the Leafs won and outplayed Montreal for large stretches of the game. It was that the CBC pulled out all the stops for a standard rivalry game and did the game in 3D. Sadly, we only got a glimpse of Don Cherry’s jacket in 3D while he was at the ACC because 3D technology isn’t ready for Don’s wardrobe. The official CBC story was that they would have needed separate 2D & 3D productions of intermission programming if they kept the 3D broadcast in all 3D. In reality, they’re just a bunch of pinkos.

#27 Calgary Flames (LW #26)
Tonight is the return of Dion Phaneuf to Calgary for the first time since his trade to the Leafs. Ron Wilson took to booing Phaneuf in practice supposedly to get him ready for the booing he’ll receive during the game. I think that it probably has something to do with what he thinks of Phaneuf’s play and hairstyle. Tuesday saw the Leafs’ captain score only his first goal of the season. And his hairstyle in the press box is embarrassing. He has it in a fauxhawk. The fuck is Elisha Cuthbert doing letting her man out in public with a hairstyle that’s near the height of douchebaggery? She did better with Avery.

#28 Ottawa Senators (LW #27)
Poor Silvio Berlusconi. My boy, the Prime Minister of Italy, looks to be quickly on his way out of power even though he just survived a confidence vote in the Italian parliament. His critics claim the reasons they want him out are “girls, gaffes and policy failures.” I didn’t realize that having a lot of gorgeous lady friends and putting your foot in your mouth almost every time you speak is a reason to bounce someone from power. That’s my main issue with these types of parliamentary governments. Dissolving the government should be because a government or leader can’t govern (because the opposition is stonewalling him), refuses to govern (like Steve Harper proroguing the Canadian parliament) or does something impeachable. Governing poorly is something that should be corrected by the Italian people when they next go to the polls and not because the opposition don’t like Silvio any more. And yes, I’d stand by this statement when it comes to Canadian government too.

#29 New Jersey Devils (LW #29)
I consulted Cap Geek’s buyout calculator this week to find out what the most cost-effective way to save the Devils would be. I think that the Devils need to buyout Kovalchuk. They’ll save one-third of his cap hit and his buyout hit will be on the books for twi.ce as long so that $6.67 million is much more manageable for all but three seasons (when it becomes $7.9 million but obviously Lou’s not concerned about ridiculous cap hits). Hell, they’ll actually save money on the cap hit (as in a negative cap hit) from the 2012-2013 season to 2017-2018 season. There’s no good reason why the Devils shouldn’t give it a shot. It’s not like their cap situation could get more unmanageable.

#30 New York Islanders (LW #30)
The Isles disappoint me. Not because I expected them to do better. They’re still a couple of years of player development, a coach, a general manager and an owner away from being a playoff contender. No, I still really want to put Kovalchuk and his Devils on the bottom of the Power Rankings. But when you’re as much of a lost cause as the Islanders, you can’t, in good conscience, put the Devils below them. And so here the Isles will stay for the forseeable future. Probably a couple of years.