Not News of the Week

A Minnesota man was charged with DWI when he crashed into a car in a parking lot and was found to have a blood-alcohol content of 0.29. His vehicle was also ceased and will be put up for auction making it the first time in history that Minnesota police have auctioned off a motorized La-z-boy. The 61-year-old chair driver also converted his recliners made for the outdoors into a kick-ass ride. It has cupholders, a stereo system, a steering wheel, and headlights, and is powered by a converted gasoline lawnmower. The police say that they’ve gotten a few inquiries about the chair and most officers are considering putting in a bid themselves.

If you want to hop an airplane to anywhere in the world, you may want to tuck your pants into your socks. A Delta Airlines flight from New York to London was grounded and the passengers moved to another plane after a mouse was discovered on-board. The pilot of the original plane was worried that the stowaway might bite through some of the wiring so he refused to take off. The passengers had to wait over three hours for another plane to take them to England. The passengers thought the pilot was joking when he said that they weren’t taking off because of the mouse. Delta Airlines described this as “standard procedure” which just goes to show how bad the economy has been on airlines. They can’t even afford mouse traps anymore.

The next stop for the good ol’ boys of the NASCAR Sprint Cup Series is the Talladega Superspeedway. That track was home to Carl Edwards’ spectacular crash earlier this year when he ended up in the frontstretch catch fence. Well, Cousin Carl (as he’s known) won’t have to worry about spectacular 190 MPH crashes anymore. That’s because a medicine man has lifted a curse placed on the track. Legend has it that when the Creek Indians were forced off the land near Talladega in the 1800s, their medicine man placed a curse on the land. To counter the curse, track officials brought in a real Creek medicine man to perform a cleansing ceremony on the track. I don’t know what’s weirder: That a race track could be cursed, that track officials would believe in said curse, or that there was a medicine man who was qualified to remove curses.

A newscaster in Australia was part of a breaking story that wasn’t on his teleprompter. Right behind him at the start of his evening broadcast was a giant, man-sized seagull. But this wasn’t an invasion of mutant seagulls. Australia’s Channel 9 uses a live camera filming Melbourne to provide the backdrop for the news studio. The seagull wandered in front of the camera just as the lead story about organized crime was being introduced. It still wasn’t as bad as things were before the broadcast started. Only 50 seconds before the show went to air, the seagull was actually pecking at the camera as if it was attacking the newsreader. Makes you wonder if it actually was a super-sized seagull that’s the first wave of an invasion…

What do world leaders do when the try to get away from it all? They call Russian president Vladimir Putin. The latest to give him a ring is Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi. Putin and Berlusconi went out into the wilderness to have a joyride in an amphibious airplane. Berlusconi took the controls of the plane and described driving it as “an extraordinary feeling of power.” That’s probably the most normal thing that Silvio has said in years and definitely not the stupidest thing he’s ever done.


2 thoughts on “Not News of the Week

Leave a Comment

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s