Good news for guys: Jessica Simpson is single! Good news for Dallas Cowboys fans: Tony Romo is single! Maybe this means there’s a Super Bowl in the cards for us. Wishful thinking, I know.

A New Zealander who is trying to get to the 2012 Olympics is opening a brothel to fund his journey. (BBC)

A writer for the Dayton Daily News tries to make a porn-related joke at the expense of America’s sideline princess, Erin Andrews. If you click the link, it didn’t take long for someone to change it to avoid the wrath of the internet. (The Big Lead)

Milwaukee’s most up-scale and historic hotel just happens to be so haunted that many pro baseball players are terrified of it. (MSNBC)

After the jump, overpaid NHL commissioners, Timmy’s invades New York, and the LeBron James dunk video… sorta.

You know that drinking and driving is bad but did you know that texting and walking could end badly too? (WCBS2)

Marvin Haven, a GP2 broadcaster, is tired of all the bad penalties that are ruining major international open-wheel racing. He sums up how I feel pretty well. (And Another Thing)

Internet pranksters are tricking people into destroying property. How dumb do you have to be to fall for some of the things they say? (FOX News)

Gary Bettman is trying to ruin the NHL but he’s getting paid well to do it. (Sports Business Journal)

You know that someone’s S&M games would end badly somewhere along the way. (Knoxville News)

It turns out that some athletes haven’t learned their “lesson” from the Steve McNair murder. At least one athlete has gone out of his way for road beef. (Deadspin)

Tim Hortons has delusions of grandeur. They’ve expanded into the heart of New York City. They’re also planning to co-brand stores with Cold Stone Creamery. That’ll work really well in winter. (CBC)

Ambitious but not rubbish is Barack Obama. His approach to foreign relations has improved how America is thought of by world leaders and the man on the international street. (BBC)