A quick plug before today’s links: We’re going to have the latest episode of the podcast online today. Since we talk about vampires near the end, it’s only appropriate that we start with Ashley Greene.

The NBA Lockout has wiped out what was supposed to be the preseason and is well on its way to taking out part of the regular season. The biggest fight the league and union will have is over the definition of basketball revenue according to Malcolm Gladwell. (Grantland)

Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi is an absolute legend around Lowdown HQ. Of course, he’s also popular in Italy because he’s the quintessential Italian. (Wall Street Journal)

Ron MacLean got caught at a club while drunk and shirtless? Is the picture real? (Deadspin)

After the jump, Ozzie wants a boat, a new old Twin Peaks game and why Spiderman 3 sucks.

My favourite MLB manager is out of a job. Fortunately for all of us, Ozzie Guillen left with an epic rant. All he wants is a fucking boat. (The Big Lead)

The WWE is grasping at straws to remain relevant now that they’ve buried CM Punk. Now they’re having their commentators talk about anal bleeding on air so it’ll trend on Twitter. (With Leather)

If you were a fan of Speed Channel’s Top Gear knock-off starring Adam Carolla, it’s going to look different the next time you see it. The producers are making a few noticeable changes to the format. (Jalopnik)

Who would’ve thought that 60 Minutes would be a place to find stories about your favourite shows? Last season, they did Top Gear. This year, they kicked off the season with a story about the boys that run South Park. (SplitSider)

Video game news time. Plot details about the likely upcoming Dead Space 3 have leaked. I figured that they’d be going to Earth and doing a giant finale to end the series. Turns out that I might be wrong. (Siliconera)

And somebody has developed a Twin Peaks game for the Atari 2600 platform. Damn fine gaming. (Joystiq)

Have you figured out your new Facebook layout yet? Here’s a breakdown of all the new features to make your social media life annoying. (Gizmodo)

FIFA 12 is supposed to be this massive step forward for the franchise but you couldn’t tell from the demo. Here’s a compilation video of all sorts of glitches.

Goal of the year in the pre-season. Todd Bertuzzi pulled off an amazing between-the-legs variant that’ll make Rock ‘Em Sock ‘Em 2012.

We all know that Spiderman 3 sucked and was so bad that Sony was forced to reboot the franchise. But now someone has actually quantified the movie’s general suckiness and come up with the 145 reasons why Spiderman 3 sucked.