As we get into the third week of the 2010-11 NHL season, let’s kick off a new feature. I figured that our hockey coverage could use a little boost so I’m starting The Lowdown’s NHL Power Rankings. Just about everyone has a power ranking list but if you need a quick primer, each of the league’s 30 teams are ranked from top to bottom. I’ve never really understood why people do power rankings but I find them oddly compelling. Hopefully these ones will be too… Except for Leafs fans.

#1 Washington Capitals
They’re the defending President’s Trophy champion and are off to a hot start this season. We really should expect much else for a team with Ovi, Semin, Backstrom and Green. The only question remains in goal where money is being saved by playing youngsters Varlamov and Neuvirth. It looks like Neuvirth has taken control of the starting job more or less but it’s still the weak point of an otherwise strong squad.

#2 Detroit Red Wings
There’s something moderately special happening in Detroit this year. Pavel Datsyuk seems to not give a shit about winning a fifth Lady Byng trophy as the NHL’s biggest pansy as evidenced by his beatdown of Corey Perry. (I’m a Wings fan so that’s how I’m spinning it.) Mike Modano, thrown out on his ass by Dallas, seems to have rediscovered his game. Team of destiny? Even I’m not willing to go that far but definitely tops in the Central Division.

#3 Los Angeles Kings
I get the distinct feeling that they have to win the Cup sometime in the next three years because big contracts will have to be given out over the next couple years and cap space will be at a premium. And it’s so far, so good for the Kings. Hell, they even busted out the retro purple and gold uniforms for a game against the Canucks. If LA switches back to purple and gold on a permanent basis, they’ll get the top spot on the power rankings.

#4 Pittsburgh Penguins
The Pens struggled to get used to the new friendly confines of the Consol Energy Centre. I guess they prefered the old neighbourhood rink feel of the Igloo. Clearly it’s just an early season skid at home that’s dropped them down the rankings. This is fundamentally the same team that won the Cup but without Gonchar. It’s not that bit a fall off from 2009. Okay, I guess Fleury’s struggles aren’t helping them much either.

#5 Nashville Predators
I don’t know how they do it but Nashville (of all places) seems to be able to consistently field a quality team. Granted, when I say quality here, I mean that they are fielding a team capable of making the playoffs rather than contend for a Cup. But still, you look at Gary’s second round of expansion teams and the only one that looks like a proper hockey team is Nashville. Amazing considering there are teams in Minnesota and Ohio.

#6 Chicago Blackhawks
I don’t like putting them here. There’s almost nothing left from the Stanley Cup championship squad of 2010. It’s still amazing that they were so bad at cap management that they had to dump a third of 2009-2010’s active roster. I’m not sure if that’s irony or swift justice. Unfortunately, Marian Hossa has rediscovered the fact that he’s an elite player. The good news for the rest of us is that his good regular seasons are a playoff jinx. Well, that and Marty Turco who hasn’t met a playoff series he couldn’t fuck up.

#7 Tampa Bay Lightning
Blatant Red Wing bias here. Yzerman is doing a good job so far as the GM. Okay, so Simon Gagne is a bust and for once it isn’t injury related (we think). Meanwhile, Steve Stamkos is helping me overcome the hockey pool trash talk over taking him 4th ahead of the Sedins. I’m still not a huge fan but he should have been on the Olympic team last year. And they’re the only team in the top 13 in the standings (after Tuesday’s games) with a negative goal differential. Seriously Tampa?

#8 St. Louis Blues
I’m not buying what the Blues are selling unless it’s Jaro Halak. Really, the only reason they’re here is out of spite. Habs fans are well within their rights to boo Price and anyone working for the team over the decision to move the wrong goalie.

#9 Montreal Canadiens
I’m probably rating them a little high based on early season success. But when the predicted front-runners are struggling, what else are you to do. Carey Price still has to prove that he can carry a team to the promised land.

#10 Colorado Avalanche
When I drafted Chris Stewart in the 7th round of one of my fantasy pools, the reaction was generally “who?” Then somebody answered “Kristen Stewart from the Twilight movies.” Now that he’s leading the league in goals, who’s laughing now. That was a steal. Paul Stastny goes in the 3rd round, Duchene in the 5th and Stewart, who plays on the same line as Stastny, goes 7th. That’s why I won the pool last year. Picking up after everyone else’s mistakes.

#11 Philadelphia Flyers
Have you heard about Bob yet? Philly’s Sergei Bobrovski is the newest in the revolving door that has been the front of the Flyers’ net since Ron Hextall retired. Philly Bob wasn’t even expected to be on the roster this year because Boucher and Leighton were thought to be more than enough after last year’s playoff run. The problem now is that two’s company and three’s a crowd.

#12 Vancouver Canucks
So it’s the 40th anniversary of the Canucks opening up shop. What will this year have in common with previous years? Inexplicable optimism from the fan base ending with no Stanley Cup. This team is slightly improved over the prior year but I just can’t see them getting far in the playoffs with only the Sedins for offense. Unless Rypien eliminated home-ice advantage by beating up opposing fans.

#13 Anaheim Ducks
Jackie will be happy that I put the Ducks in the top 16. Granted, they’re only ranked 8th of the Western Conference teams but I think they’re more likely to hold their place in the standings than St. Louis. My biggest problem with the Ducks is Hiller’s matte black helmet. Get some colour or a design on that thing kid. You should get paid enough to afford a painted helmet.

#14 Boston Bruins
When you go up and down this list, you’d be hard-pressed to find a better (proven) one-two punch in goal than the one in Boston. This team lives and dies by how Rask and Thomas play between the pipes. It’s not like they have an abundance of scoring no matter how hard they tried in the off-season. Bonus points for Seguin+ for Kessel.

#15 New York Islanders
The Islanders might not be tops in the standings but they’ve done something reasonably smart this year. They’re starting Rollie the Goalie ahead of DiPietro. Why the hell did Chuck and Garth think that a 15-year deal was such a good idea?

#16 Dallas Stars
Apart from Brenden Morrow, I couldn’t tell you one player on the Stars’ roster. They’re this year’s Coyotes. They should be completely hopeless and wallowing where they were last season but are succeeding in spite of themselves. Seriously, they play for Tom Hicks. Nobody plays well for him and yet these boys are. I don’t know how long this’ll last but I have a bit more faith in them than the next undefeated team on the list.

#17 Toronto Maple Leafs
Why are they all the way down here? Because 16 teams make the playoffs. Despite the hot start, I’m not buying the Make Believes as a playoff contender. I don’t think they’ll be a bottom five team either, though. They’ve reassumed their old position from the JFJ days where they’ll be stuck in 9th and 10th place purgatory for all eternity. That brings a smile to my face and million more, I’m sure.

#18 New Jersey Devils
The Curse of Kovalchuk. That is all. What you were expecting more? This team lives and dies with that overpaid bum. Either he steps up sometime over the next 15 years or the team is completely screwed. Lou Lamoriello should be shown the door for this fuck up but I don’t see it happening.

#19 San Jose Sharks
Actually, if I did a playoff power ranking with only 16 teams, I’m pretty sure the Sharks would be in 19th. Evgeni Nabakov has escaped back to Russia despite actually being a good goalie… in the regular season. I’m not buying the Finnish tandem of Niemi and Nittimaki despite the ridiculous success that San Jose has had with Finnish goalies. Neither of them are game changing goalies and I don’t think either of them are on Nabakov’s level regardless of the time of year.

#20 Edmonton Oilers
The Oilers are on the rise this season. Granted, “on the rise” means that they don’t finish last in the league this year. Finishing 29th would be an improvement. So far, the team looks good enough that they should avoid the bottom five. I don’t think they’ll make the playoffs yet but it can’t be more than a few years off.

#21 Atlanta Thrashers
I want to rank this team higher but it’s just not possible. When a quarter of your lineup has brand new Stanley Cup rings, you’d think that success would permeate in the locker room. But it’s like Atlanta does something to you that saps the ability to win right out of you. Okay, they’re above .500 right now but Atlanta falling into their usual place will happen eventually. Unless they don’t collapse which means that the Mayans were right and the Earth will implode in 2012 and we’re all doomed in which case hockey will be the last thing on everyone’s minds.

#22 Buffalo Sabres
Not very pretty so far for the defending Northeast Division champion (a fact from last year that still escapes me). This is a team that consists of Ryan Miller and a bunch of guys that will bail on the city if they don’t get contracts above market price. Consider this Buffalo’s long-term place in the Power Rankings.

#23 Phoenix Coyotes
They are who we thought they were. Man, Denny Green is sure getting a lot of mileage out of that line here. I’m almost as bad as that Coors Light commercial with him saying that line. They did turn that line into a Coors Light commercial right? Oh hell, I don’t remember.

#24 Carolina Hurricanes
If Cam Ward could score, he’d be the perfect player. Unfortunately, Ward isn’t the only player on the team. There are 18 skaters that seem to have forgotten that putting the puck into the opposing net is a good thing. Their highest scorer is Jussi Jokinen with four points. Okay, four in five games isn’t bad but at this point of the season, you should probably have at least one player with 1 PPG. And this is why the Cardiac ‘Canes will only be stopping the hearts of their fans this year.

#25 Columbus Blue Jackets
Did anyone actually expect much out of them to start the season? Steve Mason was actually a star player once. Hell, he even got consideration for a spot on the Olympic team. Anybody still backing him for the 2014 job? Well, maybe if he ends up in the KHL and Gary decides not to send the pros to Sochi.

#26 New York Rangers
The best moment of the season so far came at Sean Avery’s expense. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again but nothing brings a smile to my face like seeing James Wisniewski telling Avery to suck a cock. At least no one in the league would be going after those sloppy seconds. Not that there’s anything wrong with it if someone did.

#27 Calgary Flames
Olli Jokinen? What the hell were they thinking or were the fumes from the oil sands fucking with the thought processes up there? He’s near the top of the team in shots and at the bottom in goals. One point, -1, 17 shots and no goals. Iggy can’t do it all. Hell, even Stajan’s doing better. They also have the worst goal differential of a team above .500 (after Tuesday’s games). They’re going to get embarassed in the Heritage Classic.

#28 Ottawa Senators
Was it 2007 when they had that monumental collapse at the end of the season and barely stayed in the playoffs or fell out? They were who we thought they were then. Now, they are who we thought they were last year. Don’t drink the Kool-Aid yet kids.

#29 Minnesota Wild
Didn’t they used to be a playoff team? The difference between then and now is that I don’t know who the coach is. This has always been a team that rides its goalie and hoped for the best. Nicklas Backstrom is a great netminder but he just won’t get this team out of a first pick lottery spot barring some miracle from the minors.

#30 Florida Panthers
I feel bad for Pete DeBoer and Dale Tallon. They’ve got the unenviable task of righting a ship that’s been utterly shit since their Cup finals run in 1996. It’s not going to happen overnight and it certainly won’t be helped by the inevitable trading of Tomas Vokoun. My only question is will Bryan McCabe’s salary be enough to keep the team above the salary floor. I realize they aren’t the worst team in the league but there’s no way they finish out of the bottom five.